Littlest Victor
by TheDarkLord'sMistress
Summary: Sequel to Everybody's Darling. When Prim thought being a tribute was the hardest thing she'd ever have to do, she had no idea what being a victor would be like.
1. Life as a victor

_Welcome, welcome to the sequel of Everybody's Darling. Oh, I just love that!_

_Also, happy birthday to Twihard475! *throws confetti*_

_)o(_

I stare up at the ceiling from under the water, small bubbles floating up towards the surface. My chest is beginning to ache with the lack of air and the water is much too cold by now, but I'm not ready to get out of the bathtub. It's such an odd luxury, a bathtub. I've come to depend on it to an almost ridiculous amount over the last few months.

I like the comfort of it, the fact that if I fill it completely I can actually swim in it, that it's something that doesn't remind me of anything in the Games.

And I love that the water can be so hot it hurts my skin, that I can scream with my face submerged and no one will hear, that I could easily drown myself and be done with the guilt and the nightmares and the pain.

But, as I do now, I always end up breaking through the surface, choking and gasping and drawing in air desperately.

I don't know if it's because I owe my life to the friends I've lost and can't stand the idea of throwing that gift away or because I'd break Mum and Katniss by dying or if it's just a selfish, primitive need to live. I like to think it's not the latter.

I climb out of the water and wrap myself in a huge, fluffy robe, wandering about the giant house I still haven't gotten quite used to.

Katniss is at school, just like Rory, Livia and Estelle. Mum's seeing patients and I wasn't allowed to come today, because she's not sure how long it'll take and I have to wait around for my team. And with Effie being on the train with everyone else, I don't even have our almost daily phonecalls to distract me today.

Even Buttercup deserted me in favour of going off to hunt somewhere.

I get dressed, grab some food and march over to Haymitch's house. It was a total dump when I first set foot into this place. I talked him into hiring Livia's mum as housekeeper, so now my mentor doesn't live in a dump any longer and my friend doesn't have to take out more tesserae. Hazelle comes by twice a week, too, to cook and collect the laundry.

I myself drop by almost every day, to make sure he eats and doesn't drink himself into a stupor. He never stays sober, but atleast he mostly remains responsive for my sake.

Atleast twice a month Katniss will run to his house in the middle of the night and drag him out of bed because we still haven't figured out a better way to deal with my nightmares. Haymitch, somehow, helps by just being there.

I'd been home for not even a week the first time it happened.

_Clove has me pinned to the ground but instead of her knives, her hands are filled with berries. She shoves them into my mouth until I'm choking, her smile growing wider and wider, nightlock juice dripping from her mouth onto my face, her teeth stained red."You don't deserve to be alive. Anyone else but you should have won. Cato should've gone home. We both should've. You couldn't even save Rue."_

_The nightlock stains turn into blood and her eyes are dead, unseeing. She pulls me against her, half a hug, half a stranglehold. Her voice changes and suddenly it's no longer Clove._

_"I died for you,"Amber hums into my ear, her blood soaking us both. Her hold tightens and tightens, pressing the air out of me, crushing my bones._

_"Prim! Prim! Wake up, Prim, wake up!"_

_My eyes snap open and I realise I must have been dreaming but there's still arms wrapped to tight around me and the hair resting on the shoulder I'm pressed against is brown. I scream as loud as I can, scratching, biting, fighting with all my might._

_"Mum!"Clove screams."Mum! Help! _Please_, Prim, stop. Mum!"_

_And suddenly reality catches up to my panic-addled brain."Katniss?"_

_"Yes, little duck,"she whispers, her arms loosening around me."It's me."_

_I take one look at the bloody tracks I left on her face and arms, then I wriggle away from her, shaking violently, and crawl under my bed. I can't hurt her more here._

_Katniss and Mum beg and plead for me to come out until Katniss gives up and goes to collect Haymitch._

_He lays down on the floor next to my bed on his side and looks at me with a sad smile on his face."Sucks, huh?"_

_"It really sucks,"I whisper back and we stay like that for a while, quietly lying on the floor. Then he holds a hand out to me, one eyebrow raised in a silent question. I nod and scramble over to him._

Mostly I can deal with my nightmares by myself or by sleeping in Mum's or Katniss's room but sometimes I can't pull myself out of it all; then they get Haymitch for me.

Sometimes we'll talk, sometimes we'll just sit there. It helps.

Haymitch is still asleep when I let myself into his house, sprawled out on the couch."Haymitch?"

He doesn't react, so I nudge him in the ribs with my foot. I've learned that it's better to keep your distance when waking a victor, not just from Haymitch reactions but my own. And he, unlike me, usually sleeps with a knife in his grasp.

No reaction.

"Get up!"I yell and when he still doesn't react, I kick him, harder this time, before jumping back quickly.

He shoots up, knife in hand, his eyes wild. Then he realises it's me and lower his weapon."Oh. Hi, kiddo."

"Hey, old man,"I reply."I brought food. And then you should probably shower. Everyone'll be here soon and you look disgraceful."

"Disgraceful?"he echoes with a chuckle, accepting a bread roll from me and plopping down at the table."What, did Effie tell you to make sure I look okay?"

"Shut up and eat,"I say - maybe I should atleast not used Effie's exact words - and we share a quick grin. I tear my own roll up and slowly pop piece after piece into my mouth. I hate going by the bakery, but the bread is truely heavenly. Luckily, Katniss goes for me more often than not. She'll only go if Rye or Taftan are on duty, though. Meeting Mr Mellark is just too painful, for both of us. Katniss blames herself for Peeta's death as much as I do. I used to hear her some nights back in the Seam, waking up shouting for Daddy to run. Now, she'll snap out of a nightmare with Peeta's name on her lips every now and again.

Shaking off that thought, I force myself to focus on eating. We finish our meal mostly in companionable silence, with the odd comment about this or that and then I go back home.

Mum greets me at the door with a smile that is just a little bit too wide and a voice a little bit too cheery."You've got a visitor."

"What, they're early?"I pretend not to notice that anything is wrong. Past her, I see a man who's clearly from the Capitol but somehow I know that's not the visitor she's talking about."I thought they'd be here at noon."

"Oh, no, it's-"my mother begins only to be cut of.  
"This way, please, Miss Everdeen," says the man. He gestures down the hallway. It's weird to be ushered around your own home, but I know better than to comment on it. I give Mum's hand a quick squeeze as I walk past her, my heart pounding in my throat. Surprises are never good.

As I walk toward the door of the study, a door I have never even seen closed until this moment, I can feel my mind begin to race. Who is here? What do they want? Why now?  
"Go right in," says the Capitol man, who has followed me down the hallway.  
I twist the polished brass knob and open the door a crack. My nose registers the conflicting scents of roses and blood.

Before I even enter the room, I suddenly know who I'll find. I force a smile onto my face."President Snow! What a pleasant surprise!"


	2. Snow's visit

"Pleasant surprise?"he replies with a chuckle."I think we'll make this whole situation a lot simpler by agreeing not to lie to each other. What do you think?"

I nod slowly."That seems sensible."

"Let's sit, then." Snow takes a seat at the large table where I always work on the assignments Madge designs for me. Only because I'm not allowed to go to school anymore doesn't mean I'm done learning. I sit down aswell; the chair's made for someone taller, someoen more like a victor, so my feet dangle a few inches over the floor. I've never felt smaller or younger. The president smiles coldly."You see, Miss Everdeen, I have a problem. A problem that began with you and has slowly infected the districts. And a little healer like you knows what we have to do, I'm sure. Keep it from spreading. Cut out the infected tissue."

I swallow hard, trying to keep my voice steady as I force myself to meet his eyes."A problem, sir? What kind of problem?"

But I know exactly what he's talking about. It began with Effie's warning right after the Games and continued with the things she's mentioned on our phone conversations. Things I know she wouldn't really care about.

_"Isn't it just like the penthouse?"she asks on the first call, and that's when I know there's bugs here, too, and we'll have to continue our little charade._

_"I've ordered a sculpture,"she says another time."But it just isn't getting here."_

_I figure it's her way to tell me there's unrest in District Two. When she says she got her order, I know they've been subdued._

_I write down everything she tells me – which districts are affected, how badly, all I can gather from her hints - and finally go to Haymitch with my list, handing it to him wordlessly. He looks over it and scowls."You're not supposed to know any of this."_

_"So I got it right?"I say and he just pulls me into a hug."Dammit, kiddo, just keep your head down."_

"A child like you survives everything we throw at her, befriends tributes from other districts,"Snow says, ticking of the points on his fingers,"Calls us unfair, challenges us and walks away safe and sound. It gives the people ideas, Miss Everdeen."

"Ideas of freedom, you mean?"I say, challenging his own proposal of not lying. I wonder if he'll stick with it. Again, he chuckles."Ideas of urprising. Of rebellion."

There's a knock at the door, and the Capitol man sticks his head in. "Her mother wants to know if you want tea."  
"I would. I would like tea," says the president. The door opens wider, and there stands my mother, holding a tray with a china tea set she brought to the Seam when she married. "Set it here, please." He places pats the centre of the desk.  
Mum sets the tray on the desk. It holds a china teapot and cups, cream and sugar, and a plate of cookies. They are beautifully iced with softly coloured flowers. The frosting work can only be Taftan's. Not quite as nice as Peeta used to make them, but still beautiful.  
"What a welcome sight. You know, it's funny how often people forget that presidents need to eat, too," President Snow says charmingly. Well, it seems to relax my mother a bit, anyway.  
"Can I get you anything else? I can cook something more substantial if you're hungry," she offers.  
"No, this could not be more perfect. Thank you," he says, clearly dismissing her. My mother nods, shoots me a glance, and goes. President Snow pours tea for both of us and fills his with cream and sugar, then takes a long time stirring. I sense he has had his say and is waiting for me to respond.  
"I didn't mean to start any uprisings," I tell him. He raises an eyebrow at me."No, I know you didn't. But you're by no means distraught by it happening, yes?"

I don't answer. He knows he's right."Your stylist turned out to be prophetic in his wardrobe choice. Primrose Everdeen, the girl who was on fire, you have provided a spark that, left unattended, may grow to an inferno that destroys Panem."

"Well, you can't kill me,"I reply bluntly."That'll fan the flames."

He shrugs, as if he doesn't care."I'm merely telling you to be careful, Miss Everdeen. Don't defy me."

"I've done no such thing,"I snap. It's a touchy subject. I don't want him to think I did anything that would make him hurt someone I love, but at the same time, I'm ashamed I haven't done anything. Amber's words echo in my mind._ Make a change._ I haven't even attempted it, unless you count that I try to distribute my winnings among everyone in the district.

"What about your little academy?"President Snow asks._ oh. And that._ My eyebrows knit in fake confusion."Academy?"

But of course, I know what he's refering to. I call it an after school activity club, but that doesn't change that it's mainly about feeding and training up my friends and anyone else who'll attend. I had Effie check that it technically wasn't against any laws and we have no weapons or anything like that. Just sports equipment that could undeniably make handling weapons much easier. Snow just looks at me with his cold eyes until I give in."It's an after school activity club,"I say weakly."I don't go to school anymore. I have to see my friends some time."

"Call it what you will, Miss Everdeen,"he replies."The Victory Tour is your last chance to turn things around. You should take it."

And with that he leaves me alone. Mum's there almost instantly."Is everything all right?"

"Yeah, fine,"I say."I'll just go check if Haymitch is getting ready. Could you and Katniss bring some food over once she's back?"

She nods, her face painfully pale. She knows this means I have something to discuss that I can't say here. Haymitch has rooted out most bugs in his house and knows which rooms are safe to talk in.

I run from our house to Haymitch's as fast as my feet will carry me.

_)o(_

_Super late update, sorry! I was very busy... But it's still Sunday, so I'll count it as a win._


	3. Changes

I tell Haymitch everything. The only thing that seems to surprise him is that Snow came by personally to threaten me."He's right. You can make or break these uprisings. A rebellion is brewing either way, has been for years just under the surface, but some districts are letting themselves be calmed again. It could take years until everyone is ready to fight. Or you could rile them up. Make it happen soon."

"Make a change,"I nod."And have them hurt my family."

He lets out a barking, mirthless laugh."It's thirteen years 'til the littlest Hawthorne is out of the reaping. And you'll have kids some day. Do it now or do it never. There'll always be a reason not to."

It's true. And at the moment, from what Effie says about the Capitol and the mood there, Snow couldn't strike right away without angering even his own people. He has to wait for the reapings and then rig it so Katniss'll go. Can I make this all happen fast enough that the fighting will be at a point that makes the 75th Games impossible?

Mum and Katniss come by and I tell them everything aswell. Mum looks terrified but Katniss just grabs my shoulders."Do it, Prim. Okay? Do it. I don't care if they do anything to me. You can put an end to all this. No more nightmares for kids like you. No more bloodbaths. Do it."

She hesitates, and then speaks quickly, as if she might lose the courage to say it."It's what Peeta would have wanted. We owe him that. We'll end this. I don't care what happens to me."

All I can do is nod. This what Amber wanted. What Rue's siblings deserve. It'll mean Posy has never have to have her name added into that glass ball. And Katniss is on my side. Yes, I'll do it.

We can hear the sounds of commotion outside. Honking car horns, shouts of greeting, doors banging shut. It can only mean my entourage has arrived.

I run out and throw myself into Effie's arms. We only get a short hug and a whispered,"Go talk to Haymitch" before my prepteam drags me away to get me ready. I see Effie scuttling off towards my mentor's house out of the corner of my eye. He'll tell her what we decided.

There's alot of kissing and hugging and even a few tears before they get to work.

While they primp me, they chatter on about everything and nothing. My heart clenches as talk drifts to the subject ofnthe Quarter Quell and Octavia exclaims,"Hamyitch'll have to prepare for lots of attention!"

He really won't be able to get a break this year. They'll replay his Games again and again, he'll be the centre of attention. The victor of the 25th Games died a few years back, Haymitch is the only Quell winner they have left.

My fingers find the pin I always wear. They'll replay Maysilee's death aswell. Over and over.

Suddenly, I'm declared to be ready and we go into the living room, where Cinna is talking to my mum and Katniss. They look to be genuinely having fun. He comes over to embrace me the second he spots me."Oh, I've missed you!"

"And I you,"he replies, kissing my forehead."How is our littlest victor?"

"Ugh, I liked girl on fire better,"I joke and he laughs."Well, you better get dressed."

It's a very sophisticated yet simple outfit. Black trousers and blazer over a lightblue blouse. He's also brought sapphire studded pins to keep my hair, which today falls freely down my shoulder in slight waves, out of my face. It's time to show of my victor's talent to the cameras.

I had a hard time picking something. I had originally settled on photography but I had a) sucked at making the pictures artsy in any way whatsoever and b) realised I didn't want to share the pictures with the Capitol. But I still keep my camera around and snap pictures all the time. My bedroom wall is full of them. Livia, me and Estelle messing around with makeup Effie sent for me. Katniss and Madge laughing. Gale with Vick on his back racing Rory who's carrying Posy. Haymitch trying to scowl into the camera but unable to keep from smiling. Mum, Hazelle and Madge cooking in our kitchen. Gale and Katniss building Lady's pen.

So now my talent is the piano. I've always loved music, Madge teaches me, which is fun, and I sometimes get Katniss to sing along. It's the perfect talent. Something I really enjoy which isn't too private for me to be comfortable to share it.

Just as I settle down at the piano, Effie walks in, followed by Haymitch who is scowling profusely and tugging at his tie as if it were a noose. Effie slaps his hand away with a scowl of her own before walking over to me and kissing me on the cheek."Go ahead, darling."

I know she doesn't mean playing the piano. Operation Rebellion is officially Effie-approved.

I nod and turn my attention to the piano. I had originally picked two songs, a classical song and the lullaby I sang for Rue when she lay dying.

But after Snow showed up, my plan is changed.

I start of with the lullaby. I see Effie clasp her hand over her mouth, Octavia silently crying, Katniss grasping Mum's arm, both of them teary-eyed. I close my eyes, focusing on nothing but my fingers playing out the tune and my lips forming the words.

Without opening my eyes, I draw a deep breath and launch into the next song. A pre-cataclysm song that I probably shouldn't even know, but Madge has a whole fundus of them and has thaught me some.

It starts of innocent enough, so by the time they'll realise they should have cut me off, it will hopefully be too late to do it without rousing suspicion.

You shout it out,  
But I can't hear a word you say  
I'm talking loud not saying much  
I'm criticized but all your bullets ricochet  
You shoot me down, but I get up

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose  
Fire away, fire away  
Ricochet, you take your aim  
Fire away, fire away  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium

Cut me down  
But it's you who'll have further to fall  
Ghost town and haunted love  
Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones  
I'm talking loud not saying much

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose  
Fire away, fire away  
Ricochet, you take your aim  
Fire away, fire away  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
I am titanium  
I am titanium

Stone-hard, machine gun  
Firing at the ones who run  
Stone-hard as bulletproof glass

And as if the song in itself isn't bad enough already, I transition into the national anthem instead of the actual end to the song.

Yet when we raise the cry

The brave will heed the call

And we will never falter  
We will never falter

We're bulletproof, nothing to lose

Fire away, fire away

From a Capitolites view, I'm being patriotic. Everyone else will see it for what it is. A call to let the rebellion begin.


	4. On tour

"That was amazing,"Katniss tells me as soon as the broadcast is finished, wrapping her arms around me."I'm so proud of you."

Everyone else crowds around to congratulate me aswell, even though not all of them understand what exactly they are congratulating me on. Octavia, Venia and Flavius are actually just talking about my preformasnce, whereas the others get the deeper meaning to it all. But there isn't much time to dwell on any of that.

Cinna bundles me up in a warm, fluffy coat with matching gloves and hat and just like that, we're on our way to the station. Katniss and Mum get to come along, as I'm expected to say my goodbyes at the station infront of the cameras anyways.

Once there, I find everyone already waiting. The camera people are pushing all around us, vying for the best shot. I try to just pretend they're not even there.

All the Hawthornes have come to see me off, and Madge, Livia and Estelle, and even some of the people I only know from my after school club. It warms my heart that so many people care and also strengthens my resolve to help free this country. They'll never have to got into the Games, I'll make sure of it.

Even though I won't be gone all that long, I make sure to give everyone a tight hug and kisses to those closest to me. Posy clings onto my leg all the while, making me promise to bring her a present and asking why I won't take her along. I gently explain that I can't, but that just makes her pout and stomp her feet. I tickle her until she laughs again and press a kiss to her forehead."If you came along, your present wouldn't be a surprise anymore!"

That, luckily, she can accept. It would have felt like a bad omen to start this whole thing with a crying Posy, not to mention the fact that it greatly upsets me when she cries, even if Rory swears she's just being a brat about not getting something she wants.

The cameras are making the whole affair rather chaotic, pushing everyone around, so it takes me quite some time to say my goodbyes. Still, it allows me to "accidentally" get in a second hug with Rory, even though I already said goodbye to him, so I'm not exactly complaining...

Even Taftan Mellark shows up, armed with a bag of cookies and an awkward hug for me and an even more awkard half-smile and wave for Katniss. The have an odd sort of almost-friendship based on feeling responisble for Peeta's death. I think Taftan regrets not volunteering, even though nearly no one ever does and Peeta wouldn't have wanted it.

Then Effie ushers us all onto the train and just like that, the cameras are gone, and so's everyone I love. Well, everyone I love who isn't on my team.

We go to the dining cart but the door opens before I even touch it.

"Surprise!"

Portia's standing in the doorway, smiling brightly, arms outstretched in an invitation to hug her. I immediately do. I didn't think I'd see her til the Capitol, if even then. She's not my stylist, afterall. But I'm really glad I do get to see her.

The rest of the day is wonderful and feels like a little reunion party. We have lots of food and joke and laugh, I show Effie, Portia and Cinna the photoalbum I've made, telling them about everyone back home, about my family and friends and even my pets; they've seen them in broadcasts before, but that's just not the same as me telling them about them. We even watch some silly Capitol shows. And when I say silly, I mean highly addictive. After only about twenty minutes, I really, really need to know what's going to happen, even though I still barely follow the plot.

"Oh my god! What the - He shot his _dad_?"I say, staring at the screen with wide eyes. Effie shakes her head."No, no, you got that all wrong. I mean, yes, he shot him and yes, that's his father, but you see, he's possessed, so -"

"Possessed by what exactly?"I demand of her. It's Haymitch who answers, though."Just your basic run-of-the-mill demonic possession. Or so we're supposed to think. But I'm telling you, that's Lucifer."

"Are we watching the same show?"Effie says, sounding utterly shocked, turning to stare at Haymitch as if he's just grown a second head."That's clearly Elsa."

I'm not even over my surprise that Haymitch not only watches Capitol TV but actually has developed theories about it, when they already go on to fighting. That's right. About a TV show.

"She hasn't been dead nearly long enough to turn into a demon!"

"Time passes differently in hell, you very well know that!"

"I took that into account, she'd never give in so soon!"

"With Azazel back in hell she might!"

I turn to Cinna and Portia for help, but they're only sniggering at my mentor and escort and continue eating cake, even as Effie stomps from the room in utter fury, throwing up her hands in a gesture of defeat.

"I cannot believe I have to work with someone who has such a profound misunderstanding of Elsa's character!"

Haymitch follows her, yelling something about _cages _and _breaking seals_. I turn back to the TV, but the end credits are already rolling. I roll my eyes and smile at the stylists."At least you two are professionals!"

"Oh, they just take _Transcendental _very seriously,"Portia says, giving Cinna a smirk."Had _The Runway Venture_ been on, you'd likely see my lovely partner here throwing an absolute fit."

"Marcello's designs are an abomination and an insult to everyone who has eyes!"

Laughing, I get myself another piece of cake and leave them to their bickering. I'm surrounded by crazy people. But hey, I'm a not yet thirteen year old girl planning to overthrow a totalitarian government, so who am I to talk?

_)o(_

_A bit of lightheartedness, because we all know the Victory tour isn't all smiles and kittens, so have this to carry you savely through the anguish._

_I'm 99.999999% sure I'll update before sunday because I'm a bad person and love when it gets darker_


	5. District Eleven

_I'm running through the forrest, but what I am running from I am not sure. It's sunny and warm and by all reasonable thought _beautiful _but I'm utterly terrified._

_I break into a clearing, breathing heavily and clutching my sides. That's when I hear the mockingjays singing, the same for notes over and over._

_For a second, I'm frozen in fear but then I run again. I make it only a few yards before my way is blocked._

_"Hi, Prim." Rue's voice is happy and warm, but blood is gushing from the gaping wound in her stomach. I stagger back, turn to run in another direction. Again, Rue blocks my path."Don't run, Prim. There's nowhere to run anyway."_

_"I'm sorry,"I sob."I'm sorry you died, I'm sorry."_

_She steps closer towards me, cupping my face with dreadful cold hands and opens her mouth to speak. Instead of words, bloody spittle flies from her lips and she collapses, an arrow through her throat. I try to scream, but now sound will come out._

_Katniss has a second arrow nocked, smiling at me."It's okay, little duck. I'm here. I volunteered to keep you safe, remember?"_

_Safe, she says. Then why is she aiming for me?_

_"Katniss, please,"is all I can force out before she lets the arrow fly. Only then do I realise she wasn't aiming for me, afterall. The arrow wisks past my head and straight into Peeta's eye. He remains standing, even smiling."She hits them right in the eye, every time."_

_His arms close around me, tightening until I can't breath."Together or not at all, Prim. Looks like it's not at all."_

_My eyes find Katniss again, hoping she'll rescue me, but she lowers her bow, frowning."That _is_ what you said, Prim."_

_Rue still dead at my feet, Katniss watching calmly, Peeta cutting off my air..._

_I try to scream again, and this time I can._

I wake up still screaming. Effie's in my room in seconds, followed by Haymitch. Crying, I wordlessly hold my arms out to Effie and she comes over to embrace me, stroking my hair and mumbling words of comfort. Haymitch walks out and returns a bit later with a mug, moving past Cinna and Portia who hover around the door, although I have no idea when they showed up. Haymitch waves them away and, at my nod, they leave me with my mentor and escort.

"Rue?"Haymitch asks, handing me the cup of tea. Effie shoots him a disapproving look, but I don't mind him asking. He's gotten a sense of when to asks about my nightmares and when to leave it be. It's weird, because sometimes I can't even tell why I want to talk about some but not others. I take a careful sip from the hot liquid."Yeah. Peeta, too. He should be somewhere on this train and instead he's -"

I can't bring myself to finish the sentence. We sit in silence, me leaning against Efiie, sipping my tea, her arms still loosely draped around me, Haymitch scanning our faces – for what, I could not say. Once I empty the mug, he takes it from my grasp."Get some sleep."

I only nod, laying down again and looking to Effie, wordlessly asking her to stay. Luckily, she understands.

.

The first half of next day passes by me in a blur. My prep team descends on me once more, there's food and conversation everyone tries to make upbeat, but I don't really register any of it until we pull into District Eleven.

Where our fence is somewhat of a joke to the people, this district seems more like a prison. And Eleven is huge. I can't even imagine how many people must live here...

We have barely arrived when I'm already taken to the square and ushered onto stage.

As usual, a special platform has been constructed at the bottom of the stage for the families of the dead tributes. On Thresh's side, there's only an old woman with a hunched back and a tall, muscular girl I'm guessing is his sister. On Rue's ... I'm not prepared for Rue's family. Her parents, whose faces are still fresh with sorrow. Her five younger siblings, who resemble her so closely. I feel my throat closing up, half sorrow, half panic. But their faces strengthen my resolve, too. I will bring down Snow before any of them have to worry about the reaping, no matter the cost.

I start with a part of the speech Effie wrote for me before I ever even thought about stirring things up, hoping to lull the Capitol controll centre into a sense of false security. I don't want them to cut off what I have to say. I want everyone to hear.

And then it's time for the personal comments. It's expected if you were allies, but Thresh and I weren't. I start with him anyways.

"Thresh was someone it was impossible not to admire,"my voice is steady, and I am glad for that."He was strong, he was brave, he was determined, but above all, he was kind. He was his own person to his last breath. Thresh wouldn't join the Careers. He wouldn't think twice about helping me, or Rue. He wouldn't play by any rules but his own. I didn't know Thresh well, but I know I wouldn't stand here without him, and I know that I wish I'd known him better."

His grandmother smiles, tears in her eyes, and his sister looks even more like him, pride written clearly on her face.

I turn to Rue's family, no longer able to keep the tremor out of my voice."Rue was more than my ally, more than my friend even. We understood eachother and we completed eachother. She is with me every moment of every day. She's in the songs of mockingjays and the taste of berries and the flowers in the meadow. From the moment our names were called, people said we were too young to win. I say she was too young to die."

I hear a curse from a peacekeeper behind me and from somewhere in the crowd, someone whistles our four note tune.

By the end of the tune, I have found the whistler, a wizened old man in a faded red shirt and overalls. His eyes meet mine.  
What happens next is not an accident. It is too well executed to be spontaneous, because it happens in complete unison. Every person in the crowd presses the three middle fingers of their left hand against their lips and extends them to me. It's our sign from District Twelve, the last good-bye I gave Rue in the arena.

"Miss Everdeen, time to go,"the mayor says, fear clear in his voice as he places his hand on my arm to guide me away. Halfway to the door, I think better of it. I should have mirrored the salute. It's not too late to do so...

I wrench away from the mayor and make my way back, reaching the stage again just in time to witness a pair of Peacekeepers dragging the old man who whistled to the top of the steps. Forcing him to his knees before the crowd. And putting a bullet through his head.

Haymitch has to drag me away, screaming at the top of my lungs.

_)o(_

_Yeah I planned to update before today but then I had a AsoIaF related meltdown, so that didn't happen... sorry!_


	6. The Victory Tour

_Sorry for the late update but I was super sick all last week and am still sick, just not as bad and i really wanted to update so yeah I made myself get out of bed..._

_)o(_

The Victory Tour passes me by in a string of events that barely conncet in my mind.

Train, speeches, dinners.

I can feel the crowd's anger, helplessness, hope, all depending on which district I'm in.

We agreed, after Eleven, that I would put on a slight pretence of being docile and complacent, just to make sure to keep me in the Capitol's good graces. The citizens, that is, not Snow and his people. As long as he knows the regular citizens of the Capitol still adore me, he can't afford killing Mum or Katniss or any of my friends. He'd have riots in his own streets, and he must know that.

But my speeches are so far beyond what is reasonable, they drip with dissent when viewed from a District point of view. Words clearly not freely spoken by a young girl forced through such horrors.

_I am thankful to the Capitol._

_It was the chance of a lifetime._

_Panem today, Panem tomorrow, Panem forever._

Really, it is clear what I intend.

And every district that dares to lift their hands into the three finger salute is answered with me doing the same, every single speech ended with four soft notes.

Every speech ended with me half ushered, half dragged of stage.

Snow's trying to counteract all I am doing, it's easy to tell. In the clearly sympathetic districts, such as Eleven, Eight and Five, the Victors are kept at a distance from me at the feasts, clearly not wanting to present us as a unit, as fraternising between districts.

* * *

I get to use my own words again in District Five.

I manage to lock eyes with Toby while speaking, silent tears running down his pale cheeks.

I draw strength from having someone to look at, someone I know I'm fighting for. Because this... this is worse than anything I said in Eleven.

"Amber was my friend. She was a sister to me. Above all, she was a hero. She gave her life for me, for someone she loved, for what she believed was the right thing to do. Amber had ideas and morals and integrity, and she decided that was worth dying for. She asked me to make a chance. I'm only a young girl, and I may not know much about the ways of the world, but I will try to do that. And we should all aspire to be more like Amber."

The roar of the crowd is deafening and they move forward rather than back when the peacekeepers move in. They chant my name, first, but someone screams another word and it floods through the crowd like a disease, infection everyone until they once again scream as one.

"Change! Change! Change!"

I'm shaking as I am dragged of stage. This is what I wanted. This is what I'm trying to make happen. It isn't any less scary because of that.

* * *

Finnick Odair is twirling me around a dance floor I have now recollection of stepping on. He makes some sort of silly small talk and my mouth forms replies without asking my brain for help, so I just let myself be lead to the music. It's only when I lose sight of Effie and Haymitch that I realise he has been slowly shifting us away from the centre of the dancefloor. I raise an eyebrow in question.

"I quite liked what you said about Annie,"he tells me, and he sounds more sincere than he has all evening. I can't help but smile."Well, it's true."

He smiles aswell, stopping mid-dance and releasing me from his grip, hand coming to my collar to adjust my Mockingjay pin."Well, you continue telling the truth, Primrose. It becomes you."

I want to ask him so many things and I can tell he wants to say more, but the cameras have found as again, their newest victor and their favourite, so there is no time for anything else.

But I leave the feast with a feeling of triumph. Finnick Odair is on my side.

* * *

My hands are shaking as I step unto the stage in District Two. I really don't know what to expect here. Their tributes might both have come home, if Peeta and I just had died first – I can't see Crane being stupid enough to antagonise District Two by revoking the rule for their tributes...

Either way, I make my way onto the stage.

Tulia Hadley stands with her face half hidden against her mother, the woman stroking her hair, a stoic look forced unto her face, her husband and son standing motionless. The sorrow still fresh in all their eyes.

Clove's sister, Olive, looks defiant and angry, but she gives me the tiniest nod and I think, maybe, she's not angry at me, but _them_. Atleast I hope so.

"We have stories, in District Twelve,"I begin, trying to force the tremors from my voice,"About warriors and their adventures. About fighting monsters and saving damsels in distress. About heroes and knights and queens. They are strong and brave and capable. They are admired, those people of legends and stories, and with good reason. They remind me of Cato and Clove. And of what they would have been in another world."

_A world without the Hunger Games_, goes unspoken.

And now the district that, by all rights, should hate me most is chanting my name, cheering for me. I raise my hands in the same gesture of victory I've seen on their tributes and victors, on Enobaria in god knows how many replays. Once again, I am more dragged than escorted of stage, but to my satisfaction, the peacekeeper's features are unnatural and covered in tatoos. Clearly Capitol. Gotcha.

* * *

District One is calm, or maybe it just seems so by comparison. The most exciting thing to happen is Cashmere coming up to speak to me at the Victor's feast. Much like Finnick Odair, she steers me away from the crowd casually."I just wanted to thank you, for Glimmer. You honoured her and that means a lot."

I smile, then falter."She wasn't your -"

I can't even finish the thought, to horrified at the idea, but she understand."No, no relation. She trained in the Academy I teach in, so I knew her."

And when she hugs and I wrap my arms around her in turn, I feel it rather than hear it in the chatter if the room. Cashmere humming our four note tune.

_)o(_

_I found the limited interaction with other victros very strange in the book and figured Snow had it that way on purpose, which was easier to hide with two victors. Everyone fawning over the starcrossed lovers and all, the Capitol probably barely noticed. With Prim, he had a problem to cover something like that up, so he let Victors he thought he controlled interact with her. Oh, Snow, you dumb snot..._

_also the speeches in CF felt so painfully weird that I'm 32494875% sure Effie wrote them like that on purpose cause she/Haymitch somewhat figured there was no stopping the rebellion, so what the hecky?_

_I put all the districts together because man would that have gotten tedious if I made each one a chapter... _

_okay back to bed now urgh_


	7. Snow's mansion

The interview with Caesar is oddly tense, or at least it seems that way to me. He smiles all the way through, as usual, but everything seems off somehow. He steers me from question to question rigidly, not allowing me much time for my answers and not letting me bring up any subject of my own. There's peacekeepers backstage and while everyone pretends that's normal, I really don't think so. I must have inflamed the districts further, that's the only explanation. My mind is filled iwth half pride, half panic and I really can't tell how I managed to get through the interview, but then it's over and Effie's leading me to Snow's mansion.

The party is admitteldy amazing. The people, the clothes, the entertainment, the food – I've never seen anything like it.

I make no effort to find company but am constantly sought out. Faces appear, names are exchanged, pictures taken, kisses brushed on cheeks. I try to stick near the buffet or dance with Cinna or Haymitch or even Flavius, but I still end up dragged from stranger to stranger.

There's a few people roughly my age around, Cassandra Snow in the lead, and they get me away from everyone else for a while until a woman intervenes and ushers them away, throwing a not entirely subtle glance towards the president himself. Of course, he wouldn't want his grandaughter around the likes of me...

I scan the room, hoping to find Effie nearby – I didn't really pay attention when I went of with Cassandra – but before I can find her or anyone else, a man makes his way over to me, friendly smile on his face. He introduces himself as one of the Gamemakers and asks for a dance. As if I could say no. I try not to judge him, though. I'm pretty sure Effie's friend Celeste saved my life more than once, and she's a Gamemaker aswell.

"Are you planning the Quarter Quell Games already?" I say, deciding I should make the best of an uncomfortable situation. Who knows what he might let slip. Unless I'm really lucky – and I'm using that term very lightly – and all hell breaks lose within the next half year, I'll have to mentor the Quell.

"Oh, yes. Well, they've been in the works for years, of course. Arenas aren't built in a day. But the, shall we say, flavour of the Games is being determined now. Mr Crane is very adamant all must be perfect. Believe it or not, I've got a strategy meeting tonight," he says. I almost snort at the mention of Crane. Of course all needs to be perfect. Another slip-up like a twelve year old winner, and entering an arena would probably seem like a lovely alternative to whatever Snow would do to him. I'm honsetly quite surprised his head is still on his shoulders.  
Plutarch steps back and pulls out a gold watch on a chain from a vest pocket. He flips open the lid, sees the time, and frowns. "I'll have to be going soon." He turns the watch so I can see the face. "It starts at midnight."  
"That seems late for - " I say, but then something distracts me. Plutarch has run his thumb across the crystal face of the watch and for just a moment an image appears, glowing as if lit by candlelight. It's another mockingjay. Exactly like the pin on my dress. Only this one disappears. He snaps the watch closed.  
"That's very pretty," I say, an edge to my voice I can't quite keep out. He isn't showing this of like everyone else does with their accessoires inspired by my pin.  
"Oh, it's more than pretty. It's one of a kind," he says, pausing and giving me a lingering look. "If anyone asks about me, say I've gone home to bed. The meetings are supposed to be kept secret. But I thought it'd be safe to tell you."  
"Yes. Your secret's safe with me," I say. And can't help but wonder just what kind of secrets he really has.

I shake the thought of to resume my search for Effie. We're supposed to be back on the train in about an hour.

I don't have to look for long because she's looking for me, too. We collect Cinna and Portia, and she escorts us around to say good-bye to important people, then herds us to the door, prying Haymitch away from the bar on our way. His speech is slurred and he stumbles a few times, but refuses the help of the attendants who hurry up.

We travel through the streets of the Capitol in a car with darkened windows. Behind us, another car brings the prep teams. The throngs of people celebrating are so thick it's slow going. But Effie has this all down to a science, and at exactly one o'clock we are back on the train and it's pulling out of the station.  
Cinna orders tea and we all take seats around the table while Effie rattles her schedule papers and reminds us we're still on tour. "There's the Harvest Festival in District Twelve to think about. So I suggest we drink our tea and head straight to bed." No one argues.

I wake up in bed all by myself, having somehow slept through the night, probably due to my exhaustion from the past few days. We're almost in Twelve by the time I wander into the dinning cart, yawning heartily.

The agenda for District Twelve includes a dinner at Mayor Undersee's house tonight and a victory rally in the square during the Harvest Festival tomorrow. We always celebrate the Harvest Festival on the final day of the Victory Tour, but usually it means a meal at home or with a few friends if you can afford it. This year it will be a public affair, and since the Capitol will be throwing it, everyone in the whole district will have full bellies.

When we reach the mayor's house, I only have time to give Madge a quick hug before Effie hustles me off to the third floor to get ready. After I'm prepped and dressed in a full-length pastle pink gown, I've still got an hour to kill before the dinner, so I slip off to find her.  
Madge's bedroom is on the second floor along with several guest rooms and her father's study. I stick my head in the study to say hello to the mayor but it's empty. The television's droning on, and I stop to watch shots of me at the Capitol party last night. Dancing, eating, smiling. This will be playing in every household in Panem right now.  
I'm leaving the room when a beeping noise catches my attention. I turn back to see the screen of the television go black. Then the words "UPDATE ON DISTRICT 8" start flashing. Instinctively I know this is not for my eyes but something intended only for the mayor. I should go. Quickly. Instead I find myself stepping closer to the television, my heart racing.  
An announcer I've never seen before appears. It's a woman with graying hair and a hoarse, authoritative voice. She warns that conditions are worsening and a Level 3 alert has been called. Additional forces are being sent into District Eight, and all textile production has ceased.  
They cut away from the woman to the main square in District Eight. I recognise it because I was there only last week. There are still banners with my face waving from the rooftops. Below them, there's a mob scene. The square's packed with screaming people, their faces hidden with rags and homemade masks, throwing bricks. Buildings burn. Peacekeepers shoot into the crowd, killing at random.

Before I even comprehend what I am seeing, it switches over to District Five. The woman says something about Level 2 and things being contained, but it doesn't look contained to me. There's fewer people than in Eight, but some of them have gotten hold of guns and there's destruction everywhere.  
I've never seen anything like it, but I can only be witnessing one thing. This is what President Snow calls an uprising.


	8. Titanium

I all but stumble from the room, my mind reeling. My heart is hammering, my hands are shaking, my mouth is suddenly dry andmy throat is closing up. I provoked this. I wanted this to happen. Why am I suddenly so terrified?

But I know why.

There's people dying right now. Killing. Burning. Because of me.

Well, not because of me, because of how they have been treated for far too long. Still, I feel responsible.

I can't dwell on it as I hear footsteps approaching and I force a grin onto my face as I see Mayor Undersee.

"Looking for Madge?" he says in a friendly tone.  
"Yes. I want to show her my dress," I say, gesturing unnecessarly to what I am wearing.  
"Well, you know where to find her." Just then, another round of beeping comes from his study. His face turns grave. "Excuse me," he says. He goes into his study and closes the door tightly.

I make my way to Madge's room. I'm still slightly shaky as I push open the door.

She's sitting infront of her mirror, attempting to put on mascara but her hand is shaking so badly she doesn't manage. I freeze at the sight of that. She's always so calm and collected. I hardly dare ask what has gotten her into such a state... But I have to know."Madge?"

She spins around at the sound of my voice and tries to force a smile, but it comes of as more of a grimace."Madge? What's wrong?"

"Oh, it's nothing,"she says, finally managing to get a hold of herself. Had I not seen her a few seconds ago, I'd believe her smile and light tone."Really, nothing. You look beautiful, Prim. Absolutely stunning."

"Thank you,"I reply, stepping over to her and picking up the mascara."Let me?"

She just nods her consent. After I finish with her make-up, I grab a brush and set to work on her hair. Not that it needs it, it falls in pretty waves naturally. Still, I really enjoy stuff like this and Madge and I mess around with eachother's hair for fun alot, not matter how much Katniss rolls her eyes at us. Once I've somewhat calmed from the shock of what I've witnessed in the Mayor's study, I decide to push Madge further, steeling myself for the worst."Will you tell me what's wrong now?"

She meets my eyes in the mirror, quickly glancing away again."We- we said we wouldn't tell you 'til the cameras are gone..."

"Madge, I need to know,"I insist, and she turns to look at me properly, placing a hand on my shoulder."There was a cave-in in the mines."

All air is knocked out off me. I gasps, drawing in shuddering breaths, but nothing seems to reach my lungs. My whole body is shaking and I feel like I might faint. Finally I choke out,"Where? Who?"

"Gale's section,"Madge croaks out,"And the one next to it. Five dead. Gale – your mother thinks he'll make it. He's – he's in a lot of pain, but he woke up two days ago, so - "

She breaks off, both her hands now grasping my arms and guiding me to sit down on her bed."Livia's dad – he – he'll likely never walk again."

This can't be real. It can't, it just can't. This is Snow telling me there is _always _someone he can hurt because of my actions."When?"

Madge stares at me, unwilling to answer. I grab her shoulders, shaking her."When?"

She shakes her head slowly, sadly."Six days ago."

When I was in Five. And said those _things_. Oh god, oh god, what have I done? Why did I think a little girl could do anything right? I have doomed everyone I love. Why did I do this? I can vividly picture Gale, lying on a bed or a table somewhere, covered in blood and soot and I can almost hear his screams of pain. Livia's dad, staring at his useless legs. Livia marching to the Justice Building to take out more tesserae. I feel the bile rising in my throat.

Madge's voice seems far away and I hear her as if through a closed door. Her hand grasps my chin and she forces me to look at her."Prim! It's not your fault. You did everything just right. Okay? Look at me! It's not your fault. Okay?"

"I said – I said,"I stutter out, my mind still racing with horror. Madge cuts me off."All the right things, that's what you said."

"The president,"I mumble, but she doesn't let me continue once more."Bugger the president. Bugger feeling guilty. You're giving the people something they haven't had in far too long. Hope. And what they do with that is up to them. Okay?"

"Okay,"I whisper back, and I almost mean it. I always knew people would die. Snow's corrupt regime cannot be brought down otherwise. I can't back down now.

I manage a smile as I get up and straighten out my dress."He can shoot us down, but we won't fall. Right, Madge?"

"Right,"she replies, linking our arms as she leads me downstairs."We are titanium."


	9. Thread

The Victory Tour may have made things uncomfortable for Snow, but it didn't exactly improve my life, either.

There is a new Head Peacekeeper, and he is ruthless. The first thing he does is reinstate whippings and hangings.

I spent every waking moment helping Mum with the men and women injured in the mine collapse. Two more die, one of them while I'm holding her hand. Her husband died in the initial blast, and I'm almost thankful she was never concious long enough for us to tell her so.

Katniss, who can't stand the sight of blood anyways, is constantly in the woods, taking along Rory more often than not. Gale is still out of comission and the Hawthornes are running low on food. They won't take money from either me or Madge, no matter how many times we offer.

One day, Katniss and Rory come home with some strange tale about two women hiding in the forest, hoping to make it to District Thirteen. I insist they take me there the next day.

The trek is long and exhausting, but I am so excited I don't care how much my legs ache. I will finally find out more, hear about other districts. All this will be worth it.

They are gone by the time we reach the hut they hid in.

I can't help myself, I break down in tears, almost hysterical. Katniss and Rory try their best to comfort me, but soon realise they just have to let me cry it all out.

"Go hunt,"Rory tells my sister,"You're better at it anyways. I'll bring her home later, it's okay."

With a concerned look and after kissing my forehead while whispering some reassurance or other, Katniss does actually leave. Good, Posy needs the food and energy. She has the measles, to make this whole mess worth.

Rory sits down next to me and pulls me against him. After a while, I calm down somewhat. I make him tell me again what exactly the fugitives said, word for word, and it's much later by the time we make the treck home.

The streets are surprisingly empty and we exchange a worried look. Did Thread instate some new law? Where is everyone?

It doesn't take us long to realises that people are either running towards the Justice Building or in the opposite direction. We take after those running towards it. I have to know what's happening.

The crowd is thickening the closer we get and once people notice me, they try to make me leave. A bit ahead of me, I see someone else pushing through the crowd and my eyes widen."Taftan!"

He'll tell me what's happening... But he only throws me a terrified look and gestures for me to get out of here.

I hesitate for a few seconds. If even Taftan once me to leave... But then I realises what that cracking sound I hadn't really registerd before is. Whipping. My heart starts racing even faster. The first public whipping. Thanks to the peacekeeper my actions brought here.

But than I here the grunt of pain and am shocked from my stupor, shoving people out of my way and running towards Thread.

"NO! Katniss! Leave her alone! No!"

Thread shows no intension of doing so. Before I can decide what to do, before I even reach them, Taftan catches the whip half-way to Katniss's back. His hand and arm tear open like the countless streaks on my sister's back."You're killing her."

His voice is calm but his eyes are burning and he doesn't let go of the whip. I quickly stand by his side, fighting the urge to fall down next to Katniss."Stop hurting my sister."

It sounds so painfully childish Thread actually gets distracted from glaring at Taftan."She broke the law, she is being punished."

"Is she sentence to death?"a new voice suddenly cuts in, so icy I almost don't recognise Madge."Because if not, you should really stop. She's as good as dead. And I don't think my father, the mayor, would be too happy about you killing a victor's sister with no good reason. Nor would the president, I'm sure."

Now, Thread wavers visibly. A woman peacekeeper I don't know steps forward, taking the chance."Miss Undersee is right. Miss Everdeen is a first offender. By District Twelve law, the punishment is fullfilled."

"Just take her,"Thread snarls, then pointing his whip at each of us in turn, Taftan, me, then Madge."One more toe out of line, and we deal with all of you my way."

We untie Katniss as fast as we can, scooping up Darius as I almost stumble over his unconcious body. He must have tried to help Katniss before...

Carrying the both of them with the help of a few bystanders, we rush to our home in Victor's Village.


	10. Healer's hands

Leevy, a girl who lived near us in the Seam, accompanies us home, filling me in on what happened along the way."From what I can tell, Thread caught her not far from the fence and made her empty her bag. All she had on her was a turkey and she said it must've gotten through the fence somehow and she just stabbed it. Couldn't prove she was lying. But apparently that is still a crime."

I exchange a nervous look with Madge. Thread might not have been hanging around the fence by accident. Maybe he was trying to catch Katniss doing something they could have her executed for, and he just got there late. Actually, that is most likely what happened. I start shaking again, bile rising in my throat. Leevy wraps an arm around my shoulder and I nod for her to continue telling me what happened.

"I have to go get something,"Madge suddenly blurts and, spinning on her heal, she runs into the opposite direction. I don't know what she's up to, but I can only hope she does nothing foolish. I turn to Leevy again."What happened to Darius?"

"After about twenty lashes, he stepped in, saying that was enough. Only he didn't do it smart and official, like Undersee and Purnia did. He grabbed Thread's arm and Thread hit him in the head with the butt of the whip. Nothing good waiting for him, I bet."

She's right, I think, swallowing hard. Nothing good seems to come from standing up for us Everdeens.

Finally, we step into Victor's Village. I turn to Rory."Can you get Haymitch? If he's asleep, just throw something at him. Don't get close enough to be grabbed, he always has a knife."

Rory nods and runs towards the other house while our procession moves towards mine. Mum opens the door and takes in the scene with a stony expression.

"New Head,"one of the miners carrying Darius offers. Mum just nods and ushers us all in. Outside, snow begins to fall.

In moments, the long kitchen table has been cleared, a sterile white cloth spread across it, and Katniss hoisted onto it. My mother pours water from a kettle into a basin while ordering me to pull a series of her remedies from the medicine cabinet. Dried herbs and tinctures and store-bought bottles. I watch her hands, the long, tapered fingers crumbling this, adding drops of that, into the basin. Soaking a cloth in the hot liquid as she gives me instructions to prepare a second brew. My hands are shaking so badly I don't know how Mum is doing this. This is Katniss we're trying to help. _Katniss. _But Mum's hands are as steady as ever. Only when I meet her eyes do I find the panic I am feeling.

"Someone go get snow and pack it on Darius's head,"my mother says and Leevy hastily obeys. The other people who helped carry my sister and the peacekeeper are slowly making their excuses and heading out. Not that I can blame them...

Haymitch and Rory come in, my mentor sucking in a deep breath at the sight of Katniss's back. Leevy returns and I hand her a piece of cloth for Darius's snow wrap, then telling her to get home – she doesn't need to be involved in this any more than she already is. Mum swats my hands away as I try to help her clean Katniss's wounds."You're shaking, sit down."

I can't help but obey. Haymitch surveys the room slowly."Anyone going to help bread boy?"

My eyes widen in shock. I can't believe I almost forgot about Taftan. He's standing of to one side silently, clutching his bleeding arm to his chest and staring at my sister's unconcious form in horror.

I get up and pull him to a chair, facing him away from Katniss on purpose. He protests as I move to get needle, thread and bandages."It's okay, I'm fine, I'm not your priority, I'm okay."

His jacket is soaked in blood by the time I can get him to let me look at his wound. The skin is split from his palm to his elbow and the cut is quite deep. Still, with him, my hands are as steady as with any other patient and I'm done before Mum is even halfway finished with arranging what skin can be saved on Katniss's back. There's a knock at the door and Rory goes to answer it, returning with Madge in tow. Her hair sticks to her face, wet from snow, and her cheeks are bright pink. She wastes no time in handing my mother a small vial."I couldn't get any more,"she says appologetically."We used a lot on Gale and I had to keep some for Mother... If we asked for more now, they'd know we'd used it on someone else, we should still have plenty left over since the last shipment -"

"Thank you, darling, I'm sure it'll be enough,"my mother cuts her of gently."Prim, would you make some tea for everyone? We could surely use it."

And with that, she disappears into her own little bubble, containing only her and Katniss.

After we've finished off the pot of tea, Darius slowly comes to. He's slightly dizzy and his head hurts, but he's more or less okay. We go through three more pots of tea – and Haymitch and Darius through half a bottle of liquor – before my mother checks the last bit of bandaging is properly secured, then she takes a step away from the table and sinks to her knees, sobbing hysterically.

I'm by her side in a second, my arms wrapped around her, my own tears flowing freely.

We stay on the floor for what must be close to an hour. The cold of the tiles is seeping into my legs and my knees hurt, but I can't help it, I couldn't move if my life depended on it. Mum stopped crying some time ago, but I can't. I just can't.

It isn't until there's another knock on the door that my head shoots up. My gaze instantly finds Haymitch and I know we're both thinking the same thing. Peacekeepers.

"They can't have her,"I say, panic rising in my chest. Haymitch gets up slowly."Might be they're here for you, kid."

"Or you,"Ireply, even though that makes no sense. Darius gets up aswell, his jaw set."I think you're both wrong. That'll be for me."

Before any of us can react, he leaves the room and opens the door. I get up as fast as my aching knees allow, following him. I arrive just in time to see Thread snap the handcuffs closed around Darius's wrist.

Before he allows them to drag him off, Darius's eyes lock with mine and he mouths three simple words at me."Make them pay."

_)o(_

_Oh, Darius, my poor baby :( why do all the redheads get screwed over in Panem?_


	11. Blizzard

Katniss wakes up a few times throughtout the night, but it's always only briefly and I don't think she really knows what's going on. Once, she mumbles my name before slipping back under. Another time she just stares at me. And then, when the half dose of morphling wears off, she awakes screaming.

Mum, her hands shaking, injects her with the rest. What we'll do when she comes around next, I have no idea. When I ask Mum, she shakes her head sadly."We used to have a lot of whippings, before Cray. I got by then, I'll get by now. By the time the morphling wears of again, Katniss'll be fine."

God, do I want to believe her...

Next thing I know, I wake up in my bed. Mum or Haymitch must've carried me up after I fell asleep by Katniss's side, having refused to leave her.

I hop out of bed and sprint down the stairs to see how Katniss is doing. Mum raises a finger to her lips as soon as I enter the kitchen and I see that Madge has taken up my spot by Katniss's side, both of them asleep. Or, in Katniss's case, likely unconcious. It's hard to tell.

"How is she?"I ask my mother in a whisper. She looks like she might faint from exhaustion at any second but her eyes hold a determination that calms me."She'll be perfect. The wound set, so I could put the snow coat on."

I only nod, not needing a further explanation right now."Did you sleep at all?"

Mum shakes her head at this."Of course not. And don't even think about starting with me, young lady. I'm not having it."

"Yeah, you should have heard her chew out Haymitch when he told her to go to bed,"Madge remarks, stretching and wiping the sleep from her eyes. I almost grin at the thought of Haymitch's face. He's used to bossing people around but he should have known Mum wouldn't be dragged away from her daughter at such a time, not if she could help it.

"Where is Haymitch, anyway?"I ask, frowning. It's not like him to leave at a time like this. My mother jerks her head towards the living room."On the phone."

I look at her incredulously. Haymitch doesn't use phones. He doesn't even have anyone he could call, even if he wanted to. Which he doesn't. My mother reads my thoughts easily."Your escort tried to reach you."

Of course. I should have called her about two hours ago as usual, but I didn't even think about something so trivial.

"Breakfast?"Madge asks, moving about our kitchen as if she lived here, too. I only nod and give my mum the sternest look I can muster."Fine, stay awake. But you have to eat. I'll check on Haymitch."

I find him in the study, looking about as exhausted as my mother, phone raised to his ear. He looks at me almost the second I enter."Kid's up."

He pauses to listen to whatever Effie is saying, getting up and walking towards me."Yeah, you too, Effie."

Then he hands the phone over to me. He already told Effie everything that is safe to say over the phone but I relate events again, anyways. Haymitch wasn't there to see and I need to straighten it all out in my head anyways.

By the time I hang up, the smell of breakfast is wafting through the house. I'm on my way to the others when there's a knock on the door. I open it to find Taftan. His clothes are soaked, his nose is read, his lips almost blue and he's shivering. He marched all across town in a blizzard. His hands shaking, he holds out a bag to me he somehow kept dry."I thought you might need bread."

"She's still unconcious,"I tell him, because we both know why he's really here. I wave him inside."Have breakfast with us?"

When we step into the kitchen, it turns out that Katniss woke up while I was on the phone. She's groggy and in pain – even though she insists it's not bad – but she is awake and staying so. My heart soars with relief.

The blizzard wrecks havoc for two more days, ending with Haymitch, Madge and Taftan all being stuck at our house for the time being. I don't mind, we have the room and enough food to last us all for atleast a week. It's actually pretty great to have this many people over. Makes the house feel less gigantic. And Madge, at least, can call her parents and explain where she is. Taftan only shrugs and says his parents surely prefer him disappearing for a while over him freezing to death on the way home.

Katniss's back and Taftan's arm start to heal nicely and with the blizzard, I doubt Thread can do any more to ruin our district right now.

I decide to allow myself a few days of calm.

)o(

Quarter Quell Announcement next chapter probably! :o


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